We live in the age of technologies. And if 10 years ago the Internet was considered a plague for the younger generation, now people communicate, work, and buy online. It’s become a part of our lives; people even find love on the Internet!
But how to get to know the person through texting? There are voice messages and video chats now, but it all usually starts from a text. It might be awkward from the beginning, but your curiosity should be satisfied. There are several topics that most people are OK talking about, and that will help you get to know the person better.
Here, we’ll see those topics and talk about the taboos based on the experience of people using services like Goldenbride.net.
Interests and Hobbies
This is a vast topic you can talk about for days. If it turns out you have similar hobbies or interests, this will bring you closer immediately. And if not, you’ll get a chance to learn about life from a totally different perspective, which is also very useful!
There are situations when people can’t answer quickly. You ask them about hobbies, and they get lost. Maybe it’s a ton of studies or work, or maybe there are other reasons. It’s like when you ask someone about a movie you could watch, and all potential answers just get somewhere.
It’s fine; you can talk about it later, little by little, and maybe even help the person find out what their hobbies are!
Exploring dislikes is also important to avoid confusion in the future. Do it carefully because we are all different, and certain topics might be very sensitive. There are general things people don’t like, such as the government, quarantine, studies, etc. Try to explore these topics or just ask directly.
It’s important to know not only what the person likes and how to have a good time with them but also what frustrates them. Talking about the negative stuff for days isn’t very useful, so make sure you keep the balance if you can.
Goals for the Future
The topic of the future is either super-intimidating or you can talk for two days about it without sleep. Dreams, goals, fantasies are all very tempting, and people generally feel very good talking about them and sharing their vision. Some other people get anxiety from that, so realize who you’re talking to before getting into the topic.
It’s very useful to find out what the person wants to do in the near future. Maybe you want to continue talking and then ask them to go on a date, expecting the beginning of a happy relationship, and they want to go to China for a year to work and find themselves. You never know.
You can get inspired or inspire them to pursue dreams after a couple of convos about the future. Isn’t that wonderful?
When you get to know each other better, it might be time to talk about families. When you know the situation, you won’t make inappropriate jokes and will understand the person better. A lot of insights appear when people find out about each other’s family situation.
Start with small questions, and don’t push a person if they don’t want to answer. Sometimes the topic is very sensitive, and it’s wise to respect personal boundaries. Later on, family stories will start to emerge, and you both will have a lot of fun sharing your experience. Peeking into how another family lives is usually very interesting.
DON’Ts If You Want to Get to Know People Better Via Texting
Here are some huge no-nos you should avoid when texting with someone:
- Don’t write dry.
This depends on the person, of course, but usually, people feel the vibe much better if you use smileys or some exclamations here and there. If you don’t, they might think you’re talking to them against your will. Be friendly; the tone means a lot. Dry answers won’t leave a good impression. Even if you want to show that you’re tough, adapt your tone a bit if you want to get to know the person better.
- Don’t ask intimate questions.
Not right away, at least. Later on, when you know each other, it will be a very useful topic. You’ll find out a lot of new things about the person and get to know their preferences, maybe even flirt. Who knows where all this will lead, right? But from the very beginning, it’s worth finding out other things about the person. You won’t leave a good impression asking inappropriate questions right away.
- Don’t play with sensitive topics and their feelings.
When you find out the person has some sensitive topics or hurt feelings, don’t play with those things. It might be very interesting to try and talk about it, but there will be time for that. Don’t take everything as a joke, and if you get some valuable answers from them, be grateful. This means they are opening a little bit to you.
- Don’t make it an interview.
Don’t shoot questions as if you’re about to decide whether to hire the person or not. Pick a pace and follow it in an organic conversation. Take a genuine interest in every topic, tell about yourself when asked or when you have to support the conversation. Nobody likes talking to someone who just asks questions one after another. That’s not a conversation; that’s a real interview.
Remember: a lot depends on the person. Someone is very open and can talk about anything. They will continue the conversation until bedtime and be ready to start it again the minute they wake up.
But there are also people who are more closed, have more traumas from the past, and are afraid to open to a new person. It doesn’t mean they’re bad or not fun. As you get to know them, you’ll develop a very deep connection, opening up to them and letting them do the same.