ChartAttack Hack Hockey Club

ChartAttack Hack HC Win The Championship!

Submitted by Hack HC on Wed, 05/12/2010 - 12:21pm
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) May 12, 2010 12:21 pm
The ChartAttack Hack are officially the champions of the 2009-10 Good Times Hockey League Of The Arts in the Zed Sharp division. The Hack's march to victory was hard-fought. After receiving a bye into the division semi-finals by virtue of our first place finish in the regular season, the Hack beat the Big Shots in two straight games to make it...
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Chartattack Hack Hockey Club To Fight Heart & Stroke On May 15

Submitted by Hack HC on Fri, 05/07/2010 - 11:34am
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) May 7, 2010 11:34 am
The Chartattack Hack Hockey Club will be participating in the Hockey For Heart Toronto tournament at Upper Canada College on Saturday, May 15. The tournament is a fundraiser for the Heart & Stroke Foundation Of Ontario. They use the money for heart disease and stroke research along with the purchasing of defibrillators that they then place in...
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Chartattack Hack Compete At The 2010 Hockey Summit Of The Arts This Weekend

Submitted by Hack HC on Thu, 04/01/2010 - 1:08pm
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) April 1, 2010 1:08 pm
Wow. It's been awhile, hasn't it? There's a good reason though: there's been no updates on the Chartattack Hack Hockey Club blog for so long because we've been playing so awesomely. We didn't want to jinx anything or mess with our mojo. There was some complex superstition going on. If you play sports you understand. The Hack went all but...
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ChartAttack Hack Hockey Club Release Dec/Jan Schedule, Pimp Some Friends

Submitted by Hack HC on Thu, 11/26/2009 - 12:05pm
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) November 26, 2009 12:05 pm
Wow. Has it really been that long since our last update? At any rate, the ChartAttack Hack Hockey Club continue to play at our top-of-the-bell-curve, win-one-lose-one pace. Right now we're 5-5 overall, having won our most recent game against blood enemies Parkdale Hockey Lads by a score of 6-0. We've got a couple other important orders of...
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ChartAttack Hack Hockey Club's 2009-10 Season Begins

Submitted by Hack HC on Fri, 09/11/2009 - 1:50pm
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) September 11, 2009 1:50 pm
The stars of the ChartAttack Hack Hockey Club will kick-off their 2009-10 season this Saturday afternoon against our enemies, the Peterborough Pneumonia. The Hack are 1-2-1 lifetime against the Pneumonia. Game time is 3 p.m. at McCormick Arena in the heart of Toronto's Parkdale neighbourhood. This will be the Hack's sixth season (42-45-20 all-...
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Ferries Stay Alive Video Clip

Submitted by Hack HC on Wed, 09/09/2009 - 3:00pm
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) September 9, 2009 3:00 pm
Here's the last part of our frienemies in the Halifax-Dartmouth Ferries' mind-melting Bee Gees/Weekend At Bernie's tribute set at the 2009 Hockey Summit Of The Arts . If you look closely you'll see members of Sloan, C'mon, Small Sins, Galore and Doug Mason (amongst others) acting like goofs. Video shot and edited by Joseph...
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Some Halifax Night Fever

Submitted by Hack HC on Fri, 08/21/2009 - 11:28am
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) August 21, 2009 11:28 am
Here's part two of our frienemies in the Halifax-Dartmouth Ferries' mind-melting Bee Gees/Weekend At Bernie's tribute set at the 2009 Hockey Summit Of The Arts . If you look closely you'll see members of Sloan, C'mon, Small Sins, Galore and Doug Mason (amongst others) acting like goofs. video shot and edited by Joseph...
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Halifax-Dartmouth Ferries Get Jive Talking

Submitted by Hack HC on Thu, 08/06/2009 - 9:33am
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) August 6, 2009 9:33 am
Our frienemies in the Halifax-Dartmouth Ferries blew our minds at the 2009 Hockey Summit Of The Arts with their Bee Gees/Weekend At Bernie's tribute. If you look closely you'll see members of Sloan, C'mon, Small Sins, Galore and Trailer Park Boys (amongst others) acting like goofs. Here's part one of their set: Video shot...
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The Smurfs Form A "Beeramid"

Submitted by Hack HC on Thu, 06/25/2009 - 11:06am
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) June 25, 2009 11:06 am
Here's the last video of our friends in the Bytown Billionaires hockey club performing at the 11th annual Hockey Summit Of The Arts. In this part they do a rip on R.E.O. Speedwagon (Smurfwagon?) and their traditional set closer, the "beeramid," a human pyramid that involves all the members funnelling multiple brews while in formation....
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The Smurf Attack, Part Three

Submitted by Hack HC on Fri, 06/19/2009 - 9:53am
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) June 19, 2009 9:53 am
Here's part three of the Bytown Billionaires' set at the 11th annual Hockey Summit Of The Arts, featuring a princely "Little Red Smurfette" and the entirely evil "613: The Number Of The Smurf":   Video shot and edited by Joseph McGinty.
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More Smurfing From Those Ottawa Pricks

Submitted by Hack HC on Fri, 06/12/2009 - 11:10am
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) June 12, 2009 11:10 am
Here's part two of The Hack's frenemies the Ottawa-Bytown Billionaires' set at the 11th annual Hockey Summit Of The Arts. In this part they bastardize Cyndi Lauper ("She Smurf"), Brownsville Station ("Smurfing In The Boys Room") and the Ramones ("Beat On The Smurf"). Video shot and edited by...
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Ottawa Gets Smurfy

Submitted by Hack HC on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 10:31am
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) June 10, 2009 10:31 am
The Hack think we're a pretty crazy bunch of dudes. We've got nothing on the Ottawa-based Bytown Billionaires hockey club, though. Those guys (featuring members of The Hundreds And Thousands, Skydiggers, Jim Bryson and Kelp Records) are fucking insane. Here's a clip of them performing rips on Helix and Trooper, in full smurf gear, at the 11th...
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The Season's Done

Submitted by Hack HC on Wed, 05/06/2009 - 10:34am
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) May 6, 2009 10:34 am
Well, that was a bummer. The Hack's season officially ended on Sunday as we were beaten in our playoff series by the La Hacienda Flying Burritos. It was a mighty close series. Game 1 was won by the Burritos 4-3 and required overtime and six shootout rounds to decide a winner. Game 2 was won by the Hack 2-1 and also required overtime and two...
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Hack Playoffs Begin

Submitted by Hack HC on Fri, 04/17/2009 - 2:41pm
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) April 17, 2009 2:41 pm
The Hack are set to kick off their 2008-09 Good Times Hockey League Of The Arts playoff run on Saturday against our arch-enemies and the team we've played against more than any other team on earth, La Hacienda Flying Burritos. It should be an interesting series. Lifetime the Hack are 7-4-3 against the Burritos, but those four losses happen to be...
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The Hack Hit The Hockey Summit Of The Arts This Weekend

Submitted by Hack HC on Thu, 04/09/2009 - 2:06pm
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) April 9, 2009 2:06 pm
The ChartAttack Hack Hockey Club will be getting down at the 11th annual Hockey Summit Of The Arts this weekend, April 10-12, in Toronto. This collision of hockey and art will feature 38 teams of musicians, actors, media riff-raff and other assorted ankle-biters from across the nation competing on the ice, on the stage, and, new this year, at the...
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Hack Prep For More Beating The Meat

Submitted by Hack HC on Fri, 03/27/2009 - 4:15pm
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) March 27, 2009 4:15 pm
We're starting to get ready for the Hockey Summit Of The Arts (happening April 10-12). Man, that's gonna be awesome.  More pressing though, is our upcoming match against arch-rivals The Meat. Both teams are going to be decimated by players being stuck working at the Junos, so it's going to be a last-man-standing sort of game. Come out and...
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Hackin' Some Lads

Submitted by Hack HC on Fri, 03/06/2009 - 5:49pm
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) March 6, 2009 5:49 pm
My, it has been awhile hasn't it? Well, the Hack are back after a month-long layoff and our next game is against our arch-rivals and the butt end of both our sticks and our jokes, the Parkdale Hockey Lads. All you social cripples mustering up the resolve to make a rare trip out of the house should know that your team the Lads will be playing...
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Stroumbo Gets A Juno Nom

Submitted by Hack HC on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 5:16pm
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) February 3, 2009 5:16 pm
Hack right winger and #12 George Stroumboulopoulos scored a Juno nomination today for his work on Moneen's It All Started With A Red Stripe in the category Music DVD Of The Year. His role in working on the DVD was apparently somewhere between "producer-type stuff" and touching Kenny from the band in curious ways. George is the...
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13 Reasons To Hate The Parkdale Hockey Lads

Submitted by Hack HC on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 4:00pm
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) January 23, 2009 4:00 pm
1. Blue uniforms remind you of the Smurfs, except more "rape-y." 2. Yawd Sylvester's nice-guy routine's a sham. He beats puppies. 3. Simon Evers has apparently scored two of his three lifetime goals against us. He must be so proud. 4. One of their goaltenders works at Exclaim. Blood feud! 5. They take great, unnatural joy in...
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Our Woeful Losing Streak

Submitted by Hack HC on Thu, 01/22/2009 - 6:02pm
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By Hack HC (CHARTattack) January 22, 2009 6:02 pm
Wow, it's been awhile since we updated this mother. Perhaps it's got something to do with our unprecedented, soul-crushing losing streak. Here's the recap. Jan. 17, 4-2 loss to Capsule Music Jan. 10, 4-1 loss to Gas Station Islanders Jan. 3, 4-4 tie with The Humiliation Dec. 20, 6-3 loss to Dirty Grips Dec. 13, 3-3 tie with The Meat...
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