Andre Charles Theriault @ NXNE 2008

BACKGROUND/COMPOSITION: Formerly known as Ghost Hands, Theriault is a singer/songwriter with an acoustic guitar — but he's nowhere near as lame as that sounds. This show was also on his birthday. Happy birthday, Andre!

Grade: 75

Comment:A lot of singer/songwriters play solo because they can't get a band together or they never got over early Bob Dylan (or Ani for the ladies). Theriault on the other hand has the rare voice and songwriting talent that render a simplified presentation not only appropriate, but necessary. I feel cheated in a way, because he couldn't sustain his sublime presence for more than three minutes at a time. He didn't seem to know how long his set was supposed to be and filled a lot of time with not-quite-cute chit-chat about his job, his birthday, and Kevin Costner movies. If only he would quit that day job of his, because a professional, prepared Andre Charles Theriault would be nothing short of magical.

Achievement of Rock 'n' Roll Expectations
80-100: Exceeds skill and knowledge expectations, i.e. rocked us so hard we peed our pants.
70-79: Achieves required skills and knowledge. Meets rock 'n' roll standard.
60-69: Demonstrates some skills. Approaches rock 'n' roll standard.
50-59: Demonstrates some required skills and knowledge in a limited way.
00-50: Has not demonstrated required skills or knowledge.

Learning Skills: E=Excellent, G=Good, S=Satisfactory, N=Sad Really

Oral And Visual Communication
Eye Contact: G
Pronunciation: E
Stage Presence: G
Stage Banter: S
Image: E
Appearance: E
Use Of Stage: G

Strengths/Weaknesses/NextStep:
There aren't many male singers whose voices I would describe as "beautiful," but Theriault is one of them. Ghost Hands was an appropriate moniker, because his voice has a way of reaching into your chest and gently squeezing your heart in its ectoplasmic grip. He is a much better singer than a talker. At 9:17 p.m., he realized he had to play for another 23 minutes and seemed daunted by the task. To kill time he talked with his friends in front of the stage about Waterworld. Points for segueing into a song about the same flick, but negative points for mistaking Mel Gibson for Kevin Costner and Jodie Foster for Jean Tripplehorn. 

Musical Analysis
Level Of Participation: E
Problem Solving: N
Teamwork: E
Work Habits: N
Organization: N
Audience Participation: G
Sound: E
Composition: E
Songs: E

Strengths/Weaknesses/NextStep: 
Theriault's music is beautiful, calming, and slightly melancholy, like breaking up with a girl after a romantic picnic. If only there had been more of it. With just single voice and guitar he would have a hard enough time competing with the chatterbox networkers at the back of the bar. He couldn't afford to waste the attention he did manage to earn with with long breaks between songs.

Other Skills And Areas Of Interest
Charisma: G
Problem Solving: N
Teamwork: E
Sexiness: E
Haircut: E
Indie Rock Footwear: E
Nods To Disposible Fashion: G
Cool Equipment: G
Level Of Inebriation: G
Actual Ability: E

Strengths/Weaknesses/NextStep: 
As a gentleman evaluator I feel slightly strange, yet ultimately justified giving Theriault an E in "sex appeal." Perhaps it's because I myself work the plaid/jeans/curly hair look, and seeing it on another man I like to assume it's a fuckable fashion. I also feel a pang of jealousy towards the soft-voiced musician who seemed to wear my chosen style with more earnest charm than I can personally muster.