Handsome Furs @ NXNE 2007

Background/Composition: The Handsome Furs are as famous for their upcoming wedding as for their debut album, Plague Park. Wolf Parade's Dan Boeckner and his fiancee, Alexei Perry, formed their guitar/synth duo in late 2005 and since then have opened for Modest Mouse and somehow enraged animal rights activists.

Grade: 80

Comment: The Furs' reputation preceded them. Maybe that was the problem. After reading all the hype about them and watching them receive their $3,000 Galaxie Rising Stars award, I expected to be blown away. Instead, I was just entertained. There's nothing wrong with having a good time, but when you're expecting to have your pants pulled down and be raped by joy "good" falls a little short.

Achievement of Rock 'n' Roll Expectations
80-100: Exceeds skill and knowledge expectations, i.e. rocked us so hard we peed our pants.
70-79: Achieves required skills and knowledge. Meets rock 'n' roll standard.
60-69: Demonstrates some skills. Approaches rock 'n' roll standard.
50-59: Demonstrates some required skills and knowledge in a limited way.
00-50: Has not demonstrated required skills or knowledge.

Learning Skills: E=Excellent, G=Good, S=Satisfactory, N=Sad Really

Oral And Visual Communication
Eye Contact: G
Pronounciation: E 
Stage Presence: G
Stage Banter: G
Image: E
Appearance: E
Use Of Stage: S

Strengths/Weaknesses/NextStep: Boeckner looked like Iggy Pop and sounded like Bruce Springsteen; an outstanding combination. He specifically reminded me of The Boss when he sang about the grim streets of Vancouver in "Handsome Furs Hate This City." Neither of the Furs moved around much. Boeckner was busy singing his guts out, but Perry looked a little awkward standing there with her tiny keyboard.

Musical Analysis
Level Of Participation: G
Problem Solving: G 
Teamwork: G
Work Habits: G
Organization: G
Audience Participation: G
Sound: G
Composition: G
Songs: G

Strengths/Weaknesses/NextStep: Something was missing from the Furs' overall sound. That missing element was a drummer. The keyboard and guitar were too moody and minimal to energize the audience and the basic drum machine beats sounded wafer thin. A live drummer could have turned my "meh" into "yeah!"

Other Skills And Areas Of Interest
Charisma: G
Problem Solving: G
Teamwork: G
Sexiness: E
Haircut: E
Indie Rock Footwear: E
Nods To Disposible Fashion: E
Cool Equipment: S
Level Of Inebriation: G
Actual Ability: G

Strengths/Weaknesses/NextStep: While their music let me down, the Furs' image was everything I could have hoped for. They are two sexy people who will have some hot hipster children some day. Boeckner could have earned 50 bonus points if he had only torn off his "Love Will Tear Us Apart" shirt and thrown it into the audience in a sweaty frenzy.