Femme Generation @ NXNE 2006

Hometown: Toronto, ON

Background/Composition: Toronto four-piece Femme Generation put on a sweaty post-punk, post-apocalyptic dance party.

Grade: 95

Comment: This is what house parties in hell must sound like: pounding drums, can-opener guitar riffs and some hypnotic frontman cackling like a crazed breakfast vampire. Meanwhile, the goody-goodies in heaven are tapping their toes to some Pat Boone shit. And to think, you had second thoughts about robbing that old lady.

Achievement of Rock 'n' Roll Expectations
80-100:Exceeds skill and knowledge expectations, i.e.rocked us so hard we peed our pants.
70-79:Achieves required skills and knowledge. Meets rock 'n' roll standard.
60-69:Demonstrates some skills. Approaches rock 'n' roll standard.
50-59:Demonstrates some required skills and knowledge in a limited way.
00-50:Has not demonstrated required skills or knowledge.

Learning Skills:E=Excellent, G=Good,S=Satisfactory, N=SadReally

Oral And Visual Communication
Eye Contact: E
Pronounciation: G
Stage Presence: E
Stage Banter: E
Image: E
Appearance: E
Use Of Stage: E
Strengths/Weaknesses/NextStep: Femme Generation reached out and touched the audience, not in any creepy way or anything. Not only did they punctuate each performance with crowd-motivating banter, they also threw out coloured rolls of tissue paper and confetti. They're like the Blue Man Group of dance rock, only they don't leave blue handprints everywhere!

Musical Analysis
Level Of Participation: E
Problem Solving: E
Teamwork: E
WorkHabits: E
Organization: E
Audience Participation: E
Sound: E
Composition: E
Songs: E
Strengths/Weaknesses/NextStep: Lead squealer Bernard Kadosh sounds like a cross between Richard Hell, Spencer Krug and a stray dog getting eaten alive. Meanwhile, the band back him by rhythmically jamming musical spikes into the listener's ear. The resulting sound is as sumptuous as fresh stray dog. Mmm, dog.

Other Skills And Areas Of Interest
Charisma: E
Problem Solving: E
Teamwork: E
Sexiness: G
Haircut: G
Indie Rock Footwear: G
Nods To Disposible Fashion: E
Cool Equipment: E
Level Of Inebriation: G
Actual Ability: E
Strengths/Weaknesses/NextStep: During one song, Kadosh dropped to his knees like an eager White House intern. During another, the band members began wrestling each other. In other words, these guys are enter-fucking-tainers.