You Can Piss On Gene Simmons

06/23/09 4:48pm

by Kate Harper (CHARTattack)

Gene Simmons has launched a new marketing tactic for his Gene Simmons Family Jewels reality television show that may involve you giving him a golden shower... as long as you're male.

Simmons thought it would be funny to advertise for the new season of Gene Simmons Family Jewels in men's washrooms and A&E came up with the idea of putting talking urinal cakes in urinals. But there's a problem — people are stealing them!

"A&E has put 'Gene Simmons Family Jewels' urinal cakes throughout the country, featuring my face on the cakes," Simmons says in a Blabbermouth.com article. "They're in most bathrooms. Now, for those of you who need detail — all you need to do is point your tool into the urinal, hit the 'cake' with your flow and don't be surprised if the urinal cake talks back to you!!!

"Please leave the urinal cake in the pee hole for others to enjoy. Reports have come in that some of you have been stealing 'em. If so, kindly remember to wash 'em before you take 'em home!"

Gross. The only thing more disgusting than wizzing on Simmons' face is stealing something with Simmons' face on it that's covered in the piss of drunken KISS fans.

Maybe someone will tinkle on Gene at these KISS dates:

June 27 Milwaukee, WI @ Marcus Amphitheatre
July 10 Sarnia, ON @ Centennial Park (Sarnia Rogers Bayfest)
July 11 Windsor, ON @ Caesars Windsor
July 13 Montreal, QC @ Bell Centre
July 15 Ottawa, ON @ LeBreton Flats (Cisco Ottawa Bluesfest)
July 16 Quebec City, QC @ Festival D'Ete
July 18 Halifax, NS @ Halifax Commons Park
July 20-21 Orillia, ON @ Casino Rama
July 28 Paso Robles, CA @ California Mid-State Fair