Canadian Idol: No Love For Loverock

While Tuesday nights on Canadian Idol are usually tense, this week's episode started off with some undemanding, relaxed fare, including an awkwardly amateurish group number and some light video segments. (Warning: the following paragraph contains an unusual amount of sarcasm. Read at your own risk.)

First, we received a tantalizing tour of the beautiful Toronto-area mansion where the contestants currently live. The house features a movie theatre, a squash court, a fridge with all the juice boxes you can drink, a sauna and an indoor pool, which the gang of best friends spontaneously jumped into fully clothed — not because the producer ordered them to, just because they're wacky, fun-loving kids who are too busy living life to consider how uncomfortable a pair of wet slacks can be.

We were also treated to a startling expose on the various contestants' styling tips: how their clothes express their philosophical views; and how their gels, mousses, hairsprays and waxes express their hair's inner voice. It was provocative, to say the least. With any luck, next week we'll get a feature on what type of toilet paper and tampons the singers use.

Anyway, after these frivolous distractions, host Ben Mulroney brought us back to Canadian Idol's cold, hard realities — singling out the three singers who had received the fewest votes following Monday night's Rolling Stones tribute.

During the show's opening group number, Ashley Coulter and Steffi D stood out as the most dynamic and professional performers, while Chad Doucette and Brandon Jones stood out as the two most deserving of tickets home. But, to paraphrase one gifted performer, what's talent got to do, got to do with it? What's talent but a sweet old-fashioned emotion? Well, nothing.

Exhibit A: Brandonmania has recently been sweeping the country. Despite judge Farley Flex's Monday night comments that Jones isn't good enough to compete at this level, audience members still goes berserk and throw up "I Want To Have Your Baby" posters every time he takes the stage.

Sure enough, Jones and Doucette were completely safe. Instead, the bottom three consisted of the talented Coulter, D and Sarah Loverock. Coulter and D, who both narrowly escaped elimination the week before, have made some of the biggest stylistic strides in the competition, establishing themselves as intriguing entertainers with real pop star potential.

Meanwhile, Loverock is the show's strongest singer. While eyeing these three gifted women, judge Zack Werner noted, "It's obviously not a singing competition, or a couple of those guys would be up there instead of those girls."

Werner's comment seemed particularly true after Mulroney revealed that Loverock would be going home. Though the performer deserved to stick around until the end, her elimination wasn't a huge surprise. Simply put, D and Coulter are younger, prettier and more charismatic. But there's no denying Loverock's pipes.

While the credits rolled and the eliminated competitor delivered a near perfect, powerful take on the Stones' "I Got The Blues," it was clear that Canadian Idol is not a singing contest. But, as Werner pointed out, "The music business is not a singing contest either, and that's a fact."