Madonna's Just Too Wussy For Nashville Pussy

The material girl just ain't trash enough to fit in with the likes of Nashville Pussy.

According to a press release that came filtering through the ChartAttack offices, Madonna implied that she was interested in hooking up with the band to play bass.

"We're really flattered that Madonna wants to join our band," Pussy guitarist Ruyter Suys commented, after seeing Madonna's latest cover for Interview Magazine that features the mega-pop icon attired in trashed-up cowboy attire.

"It was really cool that she got all those fake cool clothes made up and everything. What were they? By Versace or Armani or something? They were kinda wrong, but we got the idea."

And if the first burn isn't enough to convince Madonna to steer clear of her raunch 'n' roll aspirations, Suys has some serious doubts about her ability to replace current bassist, Tracy "Kick Ass" Almazan.

"I guess Madonna thought playing guitar with only four strings on it would be easier," she said. "She should stick with acting instead of trying to be bad at guitar as well. But if Madonna wants to play guitar, I just hope she doesn't get any lessons from Courtney [Love]."

Referring to her videos, Suys then proceeded to mock Madonna's "boot scooting" and bull-riding capabilities (referring, of course, to a mechanical bull) before adding, "And hell, if she's gonna be around us, she's got to have a lot more respect for cars and old folks."

The way-too-cool-for-Madonna Nashville Pussy are currently in the studio working on their next album and gearing up for their world tour. Yee-haw.

Here are some dates with Tricky Woo:
May 10 Halifax, NS @ Marquee Club
May 11 Moncton, NB @ 53rd & 3rd
May 12 Quebec, QC @ Chez Dagobert
May 14 Monteal, QC @ Cafe Campus
May 15 Ottawa, ON @ Barrymores
May 16 St. Catharines, ON @ Malibu Jack's Hideaway